[Oxnard, California] Jimmy Fhartkrapp Smith was found dead yesterday afternoon in a position that surprised no one, according to his co-members at the Professional Masturbation League.
"He had the 8008XE-6000, the highest grade sex doll available. It had a 12 horsepower pussy and the added shop wet-vac blow-job capability. We when saw the doll's insanely huge tits tied up like that, we know he died happy," said a member with rather sticky hands.
It was determined that during the previous two days, Smith had finished cumming 37 times with his enormously bondage-boobed sex doll who he had named Patty Sukkitoff.
Smith had been attending the Cosmetic School of Hair Removal, and was just 19. His completely dehydrated body weighed just 75 pounds, and the medical examiner stated that the victim's dick and his hand look as if they had been polished with 200 grit sandpaper.
The medical examiner was seen putting the Patty Suckitoff doll in the trunk of his car late one night, explaining that because they were short of staff, he would evaluate Patty Suckitoff single-handedly at home.
(Please note, some details may not be completely accurate.)
[Oxnard, California] Jimmy Fhartkrapp Smith was found dead yesterday afternoon in a position that surprised no one, according to his co-members at the Professional Masturbation League.
"He had the 8008XE-6000, the highest grade sex doll available. It had a 12 horsepower pussy and the added shop wet-vac blow-job capability. We when saw the doll's insanely huge tits tied up like that, we know he died happy," said a member with rather sticky hands.
It was determined that during the previous two days, Smith had finished cumming 37 times with his enormously bondage-boobed sex doll who he had named Patty Sukkitoff.
Smith had been attending the Cosmetic School of Hair Removal, and was just 19. His completely dehydrated body weighed just 75 pounds, and the medical examiner stated that the victim's dick and his hand look as if they had been polished with 200 grit sandpaper.
The medical examiner was seen putting the Patty Suckitoff doll in the trunk of his car late one night, explaining that because they were short of staff, he would evaluate Patty Suckitoff single-handedly at home.
(Please note, some details may not be completely accurate.)
Bros been dead a long time. He was going when he was coming.
What a pethetic end to a pathetic existence.